Monday, February 3, 2014

The things you find when you're moving!!!!

I remember writing this in English 101, about 1995

The river lies nestled in the back woods, curving almost back upon itself.  Entangled maple trees tower overhead, creating a shaded retreat.  The cool river water is translucent, and the center appears to be motionless.  The rocks, sand, and fish that inhabit the river are clearly visible, as if I am looking through a glass bottom boat.  Water spiders glide across the water's surface causing circular ripples to fan out until they reach the bank on either side.  Deep green leaves bring a fresh, clean look and smell to the area.  There is one large light brown rock protruding out of the center of the river, three smaller rocks next to it creating a path from the riverbank to the rock.  A ray of light shines down through the trees, slightly warming the flat surface of the rock.  The air is heavy, and the light breeze barely moves the hot air.  Small, pale pink blossoms of the mountain laurel, mixed with the scent of decaying wood, give the forest a feeling of the old combined with the new.  The bright noon sun shines down; foggy particles of dander float in the sun's rays.  The animals are quiet, taking a siesta.  The faint sound of the waterfalls down river is the only sound above the rustling leaves.
From the view on the rock. looking up-river, there is a tall pine tree with long, drooping branches.  Underneath, close to the trunk, the briars are entwined making a cozy home for a family of rabbits.  Light brown fur is barely visible against the green of the fragrant pine needles.  A regal buck emerges cautiously from the trees.  He pauses near the river, sniffing and listening, to check for danger. He slowly moves towards the river, looks directly at me, and deciding that I am no danger, drinks the sweet, cold water.  Suddenly he perks his head up, turns around and silently bounds away in long, quick leaps..  The sun starts to dip toward the west.  Slowly, animals rouse from their siesta and bring the forest to life once again.  Various distinct bird calls penetrate the silence.  The family of rabbits wake, bounding from their home in search of food, their noses in constant motion.  Gray squirrels and chipmunks scramble from tree to tree, trying to out do each other in a contest of daring, each jump more adventurous than the last.  A raccoon and his mate lumber to the river bank.  Using their front paws like hands, they scoop crawfish from under small rocks and crunch them with delight.  A rare blue heron, with a wing span of about five feet, glides down to the river.  She lands on a rock on the right side of the river and inspect the fish idly swimming below the surface.  With quick movements, she dips down and ensnares a rainbow trout in her large bill.  The trout flops, trying to get free.  With as much grace as when she landed, she flies off again. 
The sun is now very low in the western sky, and the chill of the night penetrates the warmth of the day.  Languidly, and with great regret, I get up from the rock.  I bound across the smaller rocks to the river bank and start home.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Human Rights

As a staunch supporter of LGBT rights, I have ‘Liked’ the page on Facebook called “I Support Gay Rights”. On one of the posts was this picture:

(BTW, I LOVE this guy!)
Some person then commented on this picture with this:
“How could one be gay and support that bigoted tactless asshole? He has the right to freedom of speech but I also have the right to comment on it.”
Comments like this make me first question the intelligence of the human race, and sadly I question that intelligence quite often. Then the next question; how can one be pro-gay rights yet feel that people that are not pro-gay rights do not have the right to voice their opinion, or, in this case, have a gay person support that freedom of speech! If we as supporters of gay rights – which I completely believe are HUMAN rights – do not support ALL human rights, then is it not true that we then become the bigots?

Phil Robertson expressed his opinion, that was it. An opinion that he has a HUMAN right to have, and to voice. For people that are so intimately aware of bigotry and of having their rights denied them, isn’t it only proper for those people to support the rights of all even more so? There is no “it’s ok for these type of people, but not these type of people” when it comes to human rights – it is something that should be available to everyone – no matter their race, religion, gender, sexual preference or personal beliefs.

I am proud to be a single, Pagan, straight (which is a word I dislike because it infers that people that aren’t straight are crooked, or bent, or not right, but I have no other word that conveys what my intentions are that people will understand) woman that feels that the personal journey that each human takes is the business of that person, and that person only. It is not the business of the government, religious groups or other humans to judge or determine if their journey is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. Let us never forget the best line ever written in the Bible (which, of course, is my opinion!):

Luke 6:37: Judge not, and you shall not be judged: condemn not, and you shall not be condemned: forgive, and you shall be forgiven:

Please note that even though this states that we shall be forgiven, I in no way feel that anyone in the LGBT community should be 'forgiven' for being who they are!  But, I do believe we should never judge or condemn another person strictly on their sexual preference.

Which segues into my next subject on this touchy topic: Alan Turing. Now, although it is wonderful that the Queen has so graciously pardoned this extraordinary man for being a homosexual, in some ways the very act of pardoning him is a bit of an insult. This man was brilliant, helping to break Nazi Germany’s “unbreakable” Enigma code, invented the electromechanical machine (which was the forerunner of modern computers) and was, by all accounts, a brilliant guy. Yet, he was arrested and chemically castrated in 1952 for having sex with a man. Two years later he committed suicide because of this conviction and castration, and I’m sure because he was treated not as the brilliant man he was and with respect for his inventions and his accomplishments, but because the law said he was ‘bad’, ‘wrong’, ‘indecent’ – Oh wait, not just ‘indecent’, but ‘grossly indecent’!
The reason I feel that this pardon is in some ways an insult is that he has been pardoned 59 years after his death! Now rather than the Queen taking the time to express her respect and gratitude for his brilliant accomplishments, the fact that he was a homosexual has again overshadowed these accomplishments. Is the sexual preference of someone the only thing that defines them? If so, then why am I not completely defined by the fact that I am attracted to men? Why is the sexual preference of someone so important that it overshadows everything they do?
I have quite a few homosexual friends – and as I list some of them here (without their names), you may recognize yourself in my words:

J is an extraordinary chef that has been on many TV shows and is determined that Native American cuisine is a tradition that is not another thing Native Americans around the US will lose, teaching traditional recipes all over the country.

J is a funny, sweet person that makes me laugh and angry, sometimes in the same minute!

L is an excellent nurse that has a heart the size of the world and wants to heal it.

C is a wonderful mother and a grandmother that has kept her family close and safe.

C is probably the one I admire the most.  Growing up in a small town, with many small minds, and still holding his head up high and NEVER apologizing for who he was, never showing his fear or uncertainty I'm sure he felt throughout his childhood.   

S is a wonderful artist, athlete and an extremely generous guy.

We are human, each and every one of us. To be identified on one aspect of our lives is ‘grossly’ unfair. We all have many accomplishments, many failures and with hope, we will have more. Let us never forget that we are all individual, yet we are all one. We are Human.

Blessed Be

Friday, December 6, 2013

More Elf on the Shelf

Here are a few more!!!

Sitting on the ledge above the living room, spying!!!
Sitting in the window watching the sun rise!


Sitting on top of the lights in the bathroom!
Yesterday I bought a waffle maker so I can maker waffles for her breakfast rather than buying those Ego things (YUCK).  She saw it in the back seat of the car last night. 
G: Forget that you bought this waffle maker, K?
Me: What??
G: You need to completely forget that this waffle maker is back here.
Me: Why?
G: Because! Now just forget it's here!!!!!
Apparently I'm getting a waffle maker for Christmas!  LOL
Happy Holidays!!!!!

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

The Elf on the Shelf

My good friend, Jessica, introduced me to “The Elf on the Shelf”, we are in love with this book and our new elf, Kelsey. She is such a little character! Her first morning, she was hiding on the shelf.

Chilling on the shelf in the dining room.

This is morning 2.
I guess she got hungry!!!
Morning 3.
Looks like I have to dust pretty badly, since her little bum got all dusty trying to get up on the shelf!!!

If you have young children, or grandchildren, in your home – I highly recommend The Elf on the Shelf!!!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Another New Chapter

I decided that if I could be a 40-something year old single woman that had no desire to have children that changed her mind in a blink of an eye, and then adopted an 8 year old girl from the foster system, then meet each challenge we encounter head on each and every day, then I can move on to another chapter.

Although I will always be ‘in’ the child rearing chapter, it’s time to challenge myself even more. So, I decided to enroll in college. I have enrolled in a 4 year BS in Business Analysis and Management. It will help me in my current position, and allow for advancement. With just a high school diploma, I’ve gotten pretty far in my chosen field, but it is about as far as I can go without a college education.

I have enrolled online at It is so great! Excellent courses with a very easy navigation. It teaches you everything you need to know about learning. It caters to the three major learning styles, gives you a quiz to find out your learning style, and then lets you choose the best way you learn the curriculum. I never have to leave my house to learn – or even get dressed if I don’t want to!

It is time to prove to myself that I CAN do it. Time to show Grace that SHE can do it and that follow through and completion of what you set out to do is an immense reward in itself, and that I can do anything I set my mind to. Time to work toward advancement in my career. Time to work toward personal growth and empowerment! No more stagnant living!!!

My first class so far is Introduction to Psychology. I chose one that I will absolutely LOVE so I don’t lose my enthusiasm. My second will be College Algebra because I HATE math (which is funny because that IS my job, which I love) and I’m very bad in math (again, funny!). My reward for completing that class will be a class I will really enjoy – Introduction to World Religions!

So, wish me luck! And, every once in a while post a note on FB for me asking how my classes are and what my progress is. Maybe that will encourage me enough not to give up! On top of everything else!

Where was it that I read Capricorn/Sagittarius people bloom late in life? How true is THAT???

Blessed Be!

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Stronger.....Maybe??

I haven’t posted in a long time, obviously. I’ve been busy, but mostly because when I have free time, I usually spend it catching up on the TV shows I wanna watch!

Today was a good day! We are having more and more of them. I still sometimes feel like, “What did I get myself into???”, but overall, things are good.

The other day when I dropped her off at school she leaned down and grabbed something. So I asked her if she dropped something. She said, “No, I’m pulling down my pants!” I started laughing so hard, and she gave me such a typical Grace look that said, “You KNOW what I mean! I’m NOT pulling DOWN MY PANTS!” All that in one look.
I think her true personality is starting to show. That’s nice, because it is really a great personality. We still have to work on sitting still, paying attention, thinking before acting, and a bit of aggression. But, these things take TIME! I’m sooo impatient!!!!

She’s drawing me a picture of her day today. I love it!

My thing is to work on my anger management skills. It is extremely difficult during PMS, let me tell you!!!

Practice and patience. Two things I’m having difficulty with. Well, mostly the patience thing. I keep hearing Ma in my head saying, “Patience is a virtue!”, as she said for my entire childhood!!!

The support I get from my family and friends is tremendous. It makes me realize how strong the bonds are. D has been especially helpful, and is so patient! I can see that she will make an incredible mother some day!

My new position is wonderful. Better hours (until summer, which is our peak time), better pay and an overall better job. Right up my alley! Oh, and of course, a WAY better boss!!!

I have a new car, a house, a daughter a great job, a wonderful family and incredible friends. I have so much in my life. I can’t imagine it could get any better!

Blessed be!!

Monday, January 28, 2013

Hurdles and Walls!

So, this weekend was extremely difficult! It was nothing she did, it was all me!
I think adjusting to another person in my home has caught up with me!! I just couldn't let the "little things" go!
I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that I still just don't feel like a mom. I don't feel like HER mom!
Changing my thought process after years of knowing that I'd never be a mom, and never really wanting to be a mom, is taking much more thought and adjustment than I expected! Lack of sleep is also taking its toll.

I have to keep my eye on the long term and stop focusing on the short term!!
Remember that it isn't going to be this way forever! We will both adjust in time!

Blessed be!